today has been a weird day.
i am alone in a quiet house, no other living soul but the cat as he bounds from room to room, chasing imaginary foes. or friends. it’s always impossible to know.
i started the day with yoga and coffee and lots of items on my to-do list. spent the afternoon learning to make wine. dinner with the honey. said good-bye to him until Saturday. read a bit, watched a bit of tv. got an email from a family member that bothered me. chatted with my sis about said email. text dad about said email.
and something happened.
in a strange, round about, unexpected way, i got the response i wanted, that i’ve been hoping to receive for a very long time.
i got acknowledgment and understanding and apology. just when i was least expecting it.
my cousin recently shared on facebook about a quirk she has that is reminiscent of her dad. this led to us going back and forth about little things we do that not only remind us of our parents, but also our parents’ parents, etc. i shared with her how i will say, “i just want a little taste” anytime i ask for a bite of someone else’s food, and make a smacking motion with my mouth. this is a move my mom and grandma have made many times in life. and i shared how i sound more and more like my mom when i sing, of the sweet memories this always brings up of singing hymns in our country church. i always beamed with pride at how beautiful my mom’s voice is.
i carry these quirks and feel connected in such a deep way anytime i realize i’m doing them.
that’s the thing about family.
no matter the road you’ve been on, the pain, the frustration, the misunderstanding. no matter the time in between conversations…a simple text can make things better. a quirk can connect you back to those you love, those you want to never forget. you can forgive in an instant because your love and desire for approval can overshadow even the greatest offenses.
you can speak your truth and hope that someday healing will come. you can hold the candle high that someday your children will be sharing the quirks they have in common with you. they will smile knowing you are never far away.